L (Near) (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
oftheletter) wrote2020-08-31 04:12 pm
oftheletter) wrote2020-08-31 04:12 pm
ic inbox (aefenglom)
[All private messages to L/Near can be left here.]
[All private messages to L/Near can be left here.]
[All private messages to L/Near can be left here.]
no subject
Beyond that, things can get messy, complicated, difficult in a way he doesn't welcome the way he would a challenging puzzle. Perhaps because there's no solution, no easy crack and satisfying finish. Just more questions, more fumbling and guessing sans any kind of closure.]
Eli.
[L greets Near by his fake first name, conversely. Whether it's more or less a sign of respect coming from L is up for debate, perhaps depends more on the person than the practice.]
I thought I might come to see you, since it's been some time since our temporary Bond. I wanted to make sure you were doing well.
[That is true, but...]
...it isn't the only reason. Someone else from our world has made it to this place, and I feel I should pick your brain, as far as the prospect of proceeding. We should be on the same page, and... arguably, you've as much a claim to stake on him as I do.
[Much as it's a grudging thing for the detective to admit, he had died. Light's life, and Kira's reign, had continued only until Near had put a stop to the killings with the proof that L hadn't managed to gather.]
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[He could allow L to beat around the bush some more, but why bother? He doesn't see the need to ease into the subject. His relationship with the man had been quite a bit different than his predecessor's, and there's nothing unfinished between them.
Near reaches into the pocket of the loose jacket he's wearing, holding out a brightly colored lollipop that he'd grabbed from under the counter. He'd added the candy on L's suggestion, after all.]
We met in the nightmare. He's younger.
[Which is all the better for him. It turns their encounters into the sort of game he can actually enjoy playing rather than one where any lives are actually at risk.]
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He should be grateful. He probably will be, once the sting wears off.]
...yes. Light Yagami is here.
[He accepts the lollipop. Consolation prize. He unwraps it and slips it inside his cheek.]
He came from early November in 2004.
[A more precise definition of "younger," though Near would doubtless know already.]
He'd have no idea who you are. I meant to come to an understanding with you, as far as what you intend to reveal to him, and what you intend to maintain as it is. I'll remain consistent with those intentions, in my dealings with him.
[Because, yes, there will be dealings. That's not up for debate; he can promise to be careful, but not to stay away.
Near probably knew that, too.]
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[The reply is calm, even - but for Near, almost jovial. It amuses him to see Light like this, knowing nothing. There had been so much about the Death Note that had been unknown to both him and his predecessor throughout their dealings with him that put them at a distinct disadvantage. It's only fair that the situation be flipped now.]
In fact, I will take any sort of reveal to him in regards to who I am to be an abject betrayal on your part.
[This doesn't sound like much of a threat, what with the tone of Near's voice remaining the same, but it is. It's just a very minor threat. He'll work around any slip-ups even if it makes the game less fun.]
He will be temporarily in my employ.
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I hope you think better of my ability to keep a secret from Kira.
[Especially one so precious as the future of his own legacy. Not like successors who could handle the prospect of being L grew on trees.
He stares in silence for a moment after Near reveals... well, something that makes him momentarily forget his own accepted offer to Light Yagami in the last little while.]
He's working, for you?
[The way his mouth twists, he does suspect it's because Near finds it amusing.]
If you deem it worth the risk...
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He shrugs and doesn't voice this aloud.]
I have few enough risks to deal with that frankly I look forward to the addition of one.
[Something to keep him on his (figurative) toes is quite welcome. Even if all he ever ends up doing is watching, and no one ever appears from later in the timeline to reveal his connection to Mr. Yagami.
I feels almost inevitable that they will. He's been spinning countermeasures for days.]
He will no doubt have many useful ideas on the application of magic in toymaking.
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It's sure to be interesting with him around. So long as he has no reason to consider you an adversary... working alongside him can actually be a fruitful process.
[Speaking from experience, and also, likely, because he's preparing a defense. He doubts that it'll be as offensive to Near as it would be to Mello, but... still. Employment and L's current arrangement with Light Yagami are very different things.]
As it happens, he and I will also be sharing a fair amount of contact.
[He wonders if he even needs to say it. Doubts it, in fact, but will Near make him, anyway?]
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[He won't make him say it. Near prefers the casual 'I already know' in this case.]
He said he already had a bond when we spoke. You're the only one he'd be acquainted with enough to think it worthwhile so early.
[And of course L would go along with it, encourage it, because he had an obsession and wasn't content with watching from afar. It had not been easy to gather eyewitness accounts of their past dealings when he'd had to start from scratch but he certainly found some.]
Though I have to question your logic. Both of you. Starting with a volatile witch on witch bond. It was the same with Mello.
[The unspoken statement here being that both of them should have more sense than Mello in regards to bonding.]
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Maybe his skill is no longer great enough when compared with his more seasoned successor. It's also possible that a sense of honor or duty compels him more after a year Bonded to his Faun that it would have, prior. Maybe his obsession, wholly unchanged in all that time, is so obvious that he recognizes the inherent futility in trying to distract from it.
Better not to focus on present folly. Better to address what he can refute, with experience from past folly and evidence to back it up.]
It's very different from Mello. That was a mistake.
[So is this, just in different ways.]
I was building a second witch Bond onto an existing one, with no monster to balance it out. In this case, I have Myr.
[Still has Myr, though he's unsure how their present distance bodes for a future alongside the obsession that can't go ignored, that will always stand to devour him.]
On his side... one witch Bond alone won't be enough to pose immediate danger. I won't allow him to go without a monster at the first sign he's struggling to cycle his magic. I'll know when that happens, whether or not he tells me; of the two of us, I have more experience with attempts to keep things hidden within a Bond.
[He's uncommonly good at it, actually, something Near knows from their time temporarily Bonded. There are partitions and walls and snagging barbed wire in places; if he's decided to keep Near's connection to him from Light Yagami, a Bond won't threaten that aim.]
...you remain without a permanent Bond with a witch. Is this correct?
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Maybe it's part of the reason he's had difficulty finding another bond sense, but if so that's not an issue he'll address any time in the foreseeable future.
In any case, there's plenty he could argue on the grounds of this being a mistake as well. But that would be pointless. The bond is already in place. The game between them has started anew and Near is merely a spectator. For now.]
Yes.
[He doesn't hesitate in his answer, doesn't feel ashamed of it. Of course he should have a proper bond by now. It's been months. It's been some time since his temporary one as well, though he's not quite feeling that feral itch yet. He believes he can get one soon enough and he doesn't see the need to supply excuses.]
Were you planning on offering?
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He had said that he would look for a Bond for Near. He has, when his own affairs spare him time to look, and truthfully, no one has stood out. No one has seemed passable, in the sense that they and Near would be able to tolerate each other for long.]
That was always, implicitly, an offer. If you felt you couldn't do better.
[As is usually the case, L's self-deprecation is more realistic than insecure. He's many things: brilliant, tenacious, driven in that mad and pure way that seems unique to savants of a particular calibre. He is also complicated, almost as poor at dealing with others as Near and almost as self-destructive as Mello. He makes for a punishing and expensive Bond where one is lucky to break even, where the good is bundled inextricably with the bad like two bits of melted candy that have fused together and hardened into a sticky mess.]
You're not Mello; you have that going for you.
[That hero-worship that is one exposed flaw away from contempt, which is one misstep away from hatred. Near already knows that L isn't God; Near believes in no such creature. It's immensely relieving to one who could be crushed or smothered beneath that weight; the fact that Mello had almost murdered him in their Bond was grim testament to the fact. L has gone toe to toe with successors before, putting them in their place and even in prison, but Mello and Near are owed a unique debt. He lingered too long in the poisonous parts of the Kira case. In laying the groundwork for Near's success years later, he took too many detours, enjoyed himself a little too much on the scenic path. He could have been more efficient; he could have won, with a few more days, that edge lasting just a bit longer.
A shame, and a waste, and blissful enough that it had warranted an instant Bond when his enemy arrived in Aefenglom.]
It would be a compatible Bond, and a net positive for both of us, likely.
[Very stable. No heady wildfires, like the bombastic drama Mello would have flung Near's way. If anything, the balance will tip too far into phlegmatic blandness. Then again, L could be giving Near too little credit. Near, after all, has grown a decade, surpassed L in years and attained his own experience as the world's premier detective. As he'd glimpsed and tasted during their fleeting temporary Bond, there's a soft and stark peace that settles in the wake of sharing that connection with the one person who has not just carried the title, but also truly been L in their world.]
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Such an old question. Best forgotten. Not that he's really capable of forgetting most things.]
Then I accept.
[He says this with a casual decisiveness, as though he hadn't denied the man the possibility before. As if he hadn't wanted to look anywhere else for a potential attachment. He says it as if it's the first time it's been brought up and turning away the offer wouldn't even be reasonable.
Is it because of Light? Does he need this connection to be closer to their shared rival? No, that's not the right word. Light had never been his rival. Kira had never been his rival. Kira had been his adversary. His true rival is no longer here, and even someone of Light's caliber could live up to that role.
Could he do better than L? The word choice isn't a good one. He could do differently than L. He could choose someone with fewer strings attached. But to say that would be better would be to look at the matter from the wrong perspective.
Near says nothing else, giving the other man a long, steady look with his unblinking reptilian eyes.]
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Perhaps, like L, he had missed the kindred company of a Bond with someone who saw the world through the same side of a one-way mirror, and for such a long time. Maybe it's easier to appreciate and accept how difficult it all was in someone else... unless, for some other reason, L abused and neglected his own needs while effectively outsourcing a self-preservation instinct onto the successor who has not yet died in their world.
Near isn't him; they are separate men, inhabiting different bodies, coming to their own conclusions with distinct minds. That aside, they had shared a name. Regardless of how that happens, whether through voluntary union or birth, most other humans consider it significant to share a name, too, and it is therefore the closest thing either of the grown orphans have to a familial connection.
He wasn't prepared for Near to accept now, or easily... but he had been prepared for Near to accept. Otherwise, he would not have offered. It would have been a lie to tell him, then, that he would remain as long as he was needed, and that Near only had to ask. In his roundabout and indirect way, Near had done so; it falls to L to maintain his end of the bargain, maintain what's owed and cyclical.
He stares back. It's uncertain whether even L will be able to win a staring contest with a snake. So far, though, no blinks.]
We'll do it, then.
[Simple, straightforward. A verbal contract that leaves no room for misinterpretation.]
If you can last for another ten or so days, though... my Bond with him is still fresh and settling. Considering the timing of a Parliamentary affair that is important to me, it would be best to wait just a bit longer before introducing a new element.
[A Bond with Near will not be volatile. It also might impede L's efforts to win over key people in securing funding for the orphanage; given how withdrawn and unpleasant both of them can be, it might be a rough time for the colors of Near's personality to tint parts of his own. He's playing with a limited social deck already, even while Bonded to one who is kind and gentle, and one who is brilliant at affecting as much convincingly.
Myr rises to meet the fledgling spark in L that seeks to do something good for the world, perhaps kindled by whatever inclination had suggested justice as an inspiration before life and experience had warped his perception of it. Light quietly pulls at the restless dark in him, toward unseen secret depths that could be very safe, where he could learn so much, and also be killed far from any hope of rescue. Their influence is roughly equal, occasionally overlapping, and from what he remembers of his Bond with Near while guessing how it might fit in with the other Bondmates, well...
Near surpassed him; Near survived. Near is a collection of greys that could precede dawn or dusk, providing just enough light to see his way with no noise or distractions. A grounding Bond, in other words, a center of gravity for the same sorts of flaws and folly that ruled Mello. Harmonious with the qualities he shares with L, and complementary, at least, to those he doesn't, a Bond with Near offers balance.
He still doesn't blink, but he cants his dark, shaggy head until the longer uneven layers graze his shoulder. Once, it might have seemed like appraisal, but there's more to it now. L's looking at Near, really seeing him, in the exact way that Mello had demanded and L couldn't deliver and neither of them could define.]
I'm so very glad that we'll be helping each other in this way, Near.
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Near nods. He's sure L is glad. Now he can easily keep track of both people from his world - how fortunate. Of course now he'll have to explain to Light why he decided to bond with a toymaker that both of them happen to be mutually acquainted with. He might be able to hide their prior connection, but the bond itself will be more difficult to keep under wraps.
Would it be considered part of an ongoing obsession, he wonders? A bond with Light's employer. Part of him hopes it's a potential conclusion his old adversary comes to, if only for the narcissism of it all.]
I will wait. It shouldn't be a problem.
[He raises a finger, not pointing it at L even if he might as well be.]
There will be no bringing up how long it took me to reach this decision. [He doesn't care. He doesn't want to hear it. It's happening now. There's ten years of difference and further weeks spent pondering his younger self's decisions to take into account.] Just so we're clear.
[It's a shallow threat. Threats have never been his thing - only results.]
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Something existed behind that mask. Every human has needs; every human feels isolation eventually, no matter how introverted or standoffish. L knows this, as well as he does because he's lived it in the same manner, but he's still gauging just how much answering humanity Near craves. Beyond that, it's an even more precise and precarious measure to gauge how much he wants from L.
Would it be read as a loser's unimpressive failure, a harbinger of liability to come? Or the sweet relief of permission for Near to let the mask slip a bit, because it's safe to?
He nods, gaze steady and level, in regards to Near's non-negotiable request.]
It isn't important to me.
[What matters is that Near reached the decision; knowing any precise length of time would neither bolster or injure L's ego. He's focused outward, in regards to his successor, and that's probably a good thing, since focusing inward leaves L feeling hollow and desperate for distraction.]
Meet me at the Coven on Monday, the ninth. 5 o'clock, if you can manage it.
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It's a date.
No, he can't get himself to say that out loud even as some awkward attempt at a joke.
He doesn't thank the man. The bond hasn't happened yet. For now it's a promise that both of them have to keep, or at least attempt to. Nothing can shake the foundations of Aefenglom until then. Neither of them are allowed to disappear. Or perhaps, if one of them did have to vanish, it would be best if it happened before the bond was made. It would be less painful for the remaining individual. Nothing can happen, is the gist of it, aside from all the things that could.
If they make it to and through the ceremony, he will be grateful.]
I'll be there, Mr. Tailor.